Monday, January 12, 2009

Then Came The U.K.

[Pound notes, plus a few dollars, at the donations box of the British Museum. Image credit: Lawrence OP.]





As the economic climate worsens, I get more plaintive e-mails:

From: "Paul S. Williamson LL.B" <no-one@nowhere.com.invalid>
To: undisclosed-recipients@null, null@null
Subject: A COMPETENT NEXT OF KIN IS URGENTLY NEEDED
Date: Jan 11, 2009 4:37 AM

PAUL SOULSBY WILLIAMSON LL.B (Hons)
16, PRIORY GARDENS, BERKHAMSTED,
HERTS HP4 2DS ENGLAND.
TEL: +44 707 708 0607
FAX: +44-7006-006-419
E-mail: no-one@nowhere.com.invalid

Compliment of the season to you and your family. I am Paul Soulsby Williamson LL.B (Hons) a personal Attorney to late Mr. Henry Chea who is an International Business Man, my Client is a nationality of your Country and is also a Gold field merchant, my client and his wife and their Three children were involved in a Madrid plane crash on August 20th, 2008. See Details on this link: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/in_pictures/7573158.stm

Since then, I have made several enquiries to your embassy to locate any of my Client's extended relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful after these Several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to trace his relatives over the Internet to locate any member of his family but to no avail hence I contacted You. I have contacted you to assist in repatriating these money and properties Left behind by my late client before they get confiscated or declared Unserviceable by the bank where these huge deposits were Deposited by my Late Client Particularly, the Bank where my late Client had an account valued at Exactly Seventeen Million And Three Hundred Thousand Great British Pounds 17,300,000.00 GBP) has issued me a notice to provide a next of kin to Claim this Account or have the account confiscated within the next twenty-four Official working days and since I have been unsuccessful in locating my Client's close relatives despite my effort I seek your consent to present You as the next of kin to my late Client since you are from the same country and Bear the same Nationality that the proceeds of this account valued at 17,300,000.00 GBP can be paid to you and then you and me can share the Money in an agreeable percentage that will improve our life.

I have all necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any claim you May make for all I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see This deal through, I guarantee that this transaction is 100% risk free and will Be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach Of the law, Please get in touch with me through my telephone Or Email (williamson_llb@live.com) preferably to enable us discuss Further on the modalities for executing this project you can also Confirm the Below information immediately for easy communication:

1. Full Name:
2. Address:
3. Age And Sex:
4. Occupation:
5. Direct Telephone
6. Mobile
7. Nationality.

You are advised to confirm the above Information immediately you receive this Email so that I will be able to procure a letter of Authorization in your at the British High Court Of Justice to make you the Next Of Kin to my late Client's Account and I want you to understand that I am a reputable and well Respected Attorney and I do not want you to betray the Confidence i shall repose in you while I am waiting to receive your positive response.

Paul Soulsby Williamson LL.B (Hons)
Notary Public Solicitor And Commissioner for Oath.
************************************************************************
Notaries or "Notaries Public" are qualified members of the Legal profession appointed and regulated by the Court of Faculties under Acts ofParliament of 1533, 1801 and 1843 and the Courts and Legal Services Act 1990.



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As much as I'd like to add some pounds to my collection of money, I'm just swamped right now, Paul...

Even with the bad English, this thing's a work of art. Notice how they don't tell you what the nationality of the supposed client is? As you can see from the occasional clumsy English constructions and the signature block at the bottom, this thing probably originated from a Spanish-speaking country.

As always, I assume that "Paul Soulsby Williamson", assuming the man even exists, isn't the one who started this. That's one of the reasons I've removed all e-mail addresses from the message. So please, don't bug him about this scam.


2 comments:

Dana Hunter said...

Wow, Cujo, what are you going to do with all that cash you're piling up?

Cujo359 said...

I've forgotten which mattress I stuffed it in, but it's around here someplace ...