Monday, September 7, 2009

A New Award, And A Worthy Recipient

It's Labor Day in America, a holiday. It's time for something lightweight to distract us from all the crap that's been happening lately. When it comes to intellectual pursuits, it doesn't get much more lightweight than Glenn Beck, so his latest book seems like the perfect holiday subject.

Image credit: Publicity shot from Amazon Books

This is the cover of Beck's latest tome. Saying it contains irony is like saying that a nuclear missile contains explosives. But it's a holiday, so picking low-hanging fruit should be OK, right?

The ultimate irony, I suppose, is the "Arguing With Idiots" portion of the title. Here is a guy who:

  • Doesn't know that energy can be stored and transferred.

  • Isn't sure whether Democrats are fascists or socialists, but is quite certain they are one or the other.

  • Called President Obama, whose mother was white and whose father was black, a racist, and then contradicted himself less than two minutes later. This particular tirade has led to a host of advertisers, including Wal-Mart, to drop their support of his show.

If there was ever a group of people who qualified as idiots, it's the people who take this guy seriously. Just as people who could spell "potato" were elitists to Dan Quayle, so it appears that people who can spell "oligarch" are idiots to Glenn Beck. Think about that.

Meanwhile, we at SnS have finally invented an award suitable for someone of Beck's intellectual attainment - the Douglas Feith Memorial Stupidist Fucking Guy On The Planet Award, AKA, The Dougie. Since stupidity is such a common commodity, potential awardees must be actively involved in politics in some way. That should eliminate about half the possible awardees, I suspect. There's no cash value to this prize, just the prestige of knowing that no one does stupid better than you.

Congratulations, Mr. Beck. May I just add that gray really is your color?

(h/t Comrade E.B. Misfit, without whom I would have heard of this for at least another few days.)

Afterword: Doug Feith's still alive you may be wondering, so why is it the "Douglas Feith Memorial, etc. Award"? It's named after his mind, not his body. (And yes, baseball fans, I stole that line from Tim McCarver. Sue me.)


Dana Hunter said...

Crap. Any idea if there are any Irony Meters available for a decent price on Ebay. I'd look myself, only I'm busy picking shrapnel out of my face...

You know what I think Glenn should get with his award? Unemployment.

Cujo359 said...

Unemployment would be nice. So would an education. Unfortunately, I can't arrange either.

george.w said...

We could try to arrange for Beck to look ridiculous, but he beat us to that years ago.